Jake Corness

This boy may be from Canada, eat beaver tail soup for breakfast, and shotgun a Molson before every 8am class, but damn if he doesn’t still bleed red, white, and blue. Be sure to always check that your local karaoke bar is up to date on their fire code inspections because this kid’s rendition of Creed’s entire discography, especially the 6 times platinum “My Own Prison”, is guaranteed to be fire. When Jake isn’t busy winning nationwide Deloitte competitions, he occupies his time steaming the magnificent rug on his chest and throwing double backies off “Lover’s Leap” at Vail Ski Resort. Consider yourself lucky that this man is already taken because back in high school, half the yearbook’s student quotes were “dang, Jake just stole my girl again.”