Trip Region: MYSTERY
Partners Trek? No
Trip Cost: $3960
Airfare Estimate: $0
Nightlife: 9 • Activity: 6
Congratulations! You’ve been accepted to business school and obviously made the correct choice to come to Ross! But let’s be honest, CONDOLENCES TO SIGNING UP FOR THE BEST DAMN TRIP OF YOUR LIFE. Why condolences you ask? Because you are about to embark on the most ridiculous excursion, to Lord knows where, with the absolute most unique, bomb AF group of high performing misfits, all of whom are veterans of mystery.
The infamous “Mystery Trek” is the ONLY MTrek where trekkers show up at the airport not knowing where they are going, and destinations are revealed as the trip progresses. If you are an “early to bed early to rise” kind of person, this might not be your trip. Your trek leaders boast the nearly biblical accomplishment of surviving Mystery 6.0: It’s 5 o’clock somewhere.
Life has given you two choices: 1) Be average and go somewhere average [any other trek where you know the destination] OR 2) Be a BOSS and join a long and venerated group of secretive individuals and make friends for the rest of your life. Clearly, there is only one correct answer here.
We feel like we shouldn’t have to sell mystery to you all, because this is the only MTrek that self selects people who love adventure, clurbing, and the unknown. If you like plastic chair restaurants, dive bars, and off the beaten path activities: this trip is for you. If you like five star hotels, a classic martini bar, and traveling first class, please call us back in 2080 when we’ve all paid off our student loans.
If you choose to join Mystery, you will forever be inducted into the Mystery family.
Quiz: IS MYSTERY FOR YOU?
Instructions: Grab your favorite pen and the nearest napkin (no, not the one with Cholula on it, that’s gross) and get ready to tally.
- Do you get anxious when people talk about “the plan”? (News flash, kiddo. There is never a plan. #doinitlive) [Y/N]
- Have you ever thought to yourself (while drinking a few casual shower beers), “Self, tonight is gonna be LIT”? [Y/YN]
- Did you ever have that nightmare as a kid that your greatest legacy would be a B+ on a World Geography test and $14.67 from a lemonade stand? [Y/N]
- Have you ever been banned from a glamping site in the desert? [Y/N]
- Have you ever put beer in your cereal? Or considered brushing your teeth with a bottle of Jack? [Y/N]
- Do you like piña coladas? And getting caught in the rain? [Y/N]
- Have you always wanted to just let it go? LET IT GO? CAN’T HOLD IT BACK ANYMORE?! [Y/N]
- Have you ever moved to the city in a broke down car but now you’re looking pretty in a hotel bar? [Y/Y]
- Do you ever get that Summer Time Sadness and just want to get away? [Y/N]
- Are you ready to have the time of your life while meeting some incredible (and incredibly bizarre) humans that will shape your Ross experience and make every day a little bit sunnier? [Y/N]
Did you answer YES to 8 or more questions? CONGRATS. You’re mystery material, and we can’t wait to meet you.
Travel Day — Friday, Aug 16
We begin the trip with a travel day underwater, where we will embark on a scavenger hunt for our mother - Dori. (Hint: She’s at the new Lake Erie location of Garage Bar).
Day 1 — Saturday, Aug 17
A tale as old as time, and how lucky are we to be able to experience it first-hand? We’ll wake up early today and head to the castle, where we find a lovely lady, our own Emily, tending to her new sad, scary monster friend - Bill. Tonight our dinner will be very extra, and Andy will sing “Be Our Guest” while Dillon twirls around the dining room. David will watch from afar and shake his head, because we are all objectively weird except for him.
Day 2 — Sunday, Aug 18
Next, we travel to London circa 1900. Emily will kick off the night by telling everyone a bedtime story. It will be long and involved and probably never reach resolution because she will get distracted halfway through and tell us about the time that she brought an ice luge to Dori’s house for gameday (no one remembers what happened after that but every now and again Emily unintentionally whistles as she speaks). In the middle of the night, Andy will teach us how to fly to Neverland with the help of his pixie friend, David. Upon arriving in Neverland, we will charter a private yacht driven by Captain Bill, and set sail to see some mermaids. We will end the day by getting turnt on Captain Bill’s yacht, and hoping pixie David doesn't have to rescue Andy from falling off in the water.
Day 3 — Monday, Aug 19
From London we’ll hop a quick flight to Sydney. Dori is still searching for something-- but this time it's Necto. Uh, we mean Nemo. We’ll take a quick tour of the GBR (Not Go Blue Rendezvous) and ultimately end up at the dentist’s office because dental hygiene is important and we care about your health.
Day 4 — Tuesday, Aug 20
We’re finally off to our next location and boy, are we in for a treat. We start in our hometown high school cafeteria - easily the #1 activity on everyone’s bucket list. We make our way through the new interactive exhibit highlighting the intriguing behaviors of high school youth. Eventually, we will get kicked out because, like, we don’t even go here.
Day 5 — Wednesday, Aug 21
We’ll travel back to London where strange things are happening. Today is the day that Dillon becomes a real wizard. We’re not surprised he’s the chosen one due to his steely looks and stealth demeanor. We’ll take the fast train out to a big castle guarded by spells and dementors. Lunch will be a once in a lifetime experience in a Great Hall, where we will mix with locals and learn about magic. We’ll cap off the day with some butter beer & fireball at a local pub.
Day 6 — Thursday, Aug 22
Today we’ll travel back to Ann Arbor because it is Thursday, and on Thursdays we go to Skeeps. And then Ricks, and then back to Skeeps.
Day 7 — Friday, Aug 23
After our quick Michigan detour, Dori will take us on a skipping tour of the yellow brick road. We’ll all join in, and after a week of mystery, everyone will be singing “If I only had a brain…”
Day 8 — Saturday, Aug 24
It will be the perfect day for us to take a quick trip to Mars. We’ll let Bill play out his fantasy of living off of his surroundings -- but he will soon realize that Martian meat does not sustain life so we will feast on cliff bars and pedialyte. Bill will try to channel Ariana Grande (once we explain to him who Ariana Grande is) and get some space away from us -- but N-A-S-A will save him.
Day 9 — Sunday, Aug 25
After the long trip to and from Mars, we’ll all be happy to land back in the USA and head to the Catskills. Our resident dancing king & queen, Dillon & Em will take us to upstate NY’s finest clurb. We’ll get bottle service (because its super cheap) and dance the night away to hits like “I Wanna Dance with Somebody” and “Body” (Dori’s personal favorite). But of course, Dillon & Em will end the night with a rendition of “(I’ve Had) The Time of My Life” because nobody puts Dillon in a corner and no song truly explains the magic of Mystery Trek like that one.
Day 10 — Monday, Aug 26
We saved the best for last. Today, we travel to Westeros. We’ll spend a nice beach day at Dragonstone where the women of the group spend a curious amount of time with a charming lad in a speedo named Podrick. We all shotgun beers as the sun sets and the wights approach, excited to leave because our bodies couldn’t handle another day, but sad to go because winter is coming and tomorrow we return north of the wall.
Departure Day — Tuesday, Aug 27
Alas, mystery is over and we must head home to Ann Arbor. But as we go on, we drink the plane dry of their mini wine bottles and remember all the times we had together. As our lives change at Ross, come whatever, we will still be mystery family forever.